Slimy, Stupid vs Unsuspecting Idiot

Lion: “Roaaarrrrrr” ( read as: I will eat you ) ( he won’t actually warn you, but just taking creative liberty to make a point )

Idiot: No, don’t eat me. I am a vegetarian.

If you think that just because you are nice to people, they’ll be nice to you, Congrats! You and the idiot have something in common, you could even try going out on a date or becoming BFFs or something. Anyhow, point is, most people are only nice to you because it is conventional and because it suits them at that point of time.

Some people are outright rude, and trust me they are the better kind to be associated with. The most dangerous ones are those stupid, slimy (don’t exactly know why, but this word seems perfect) ones, who’ll be all grinning and smiling, but will actually take the pettiest route to hurt/annoy you.  They are stupid enough to assume that you are stupid enough to not doubt their intentions and are stupid enough to not understand your sarcasm, and render it futile.

When I encounter such stupidity, my first natural instinct is to defend myself by sarcasm, as expected it is ineffective, because sarcasm requires intelligence, these slimy kind unfortunately or fortunately, lack that. The next is to ignore them and try to keep away, as much as possible. But. There is a very important step in between. Make sure you make the person, stupid-slimy-kind, know that you are not as stupid as them and are aware of their slime.  Preferably with an audience, if they were involved at some stage in all this slime and stupidity. This is a very important step because:

  

  1.      It ensures that the stupid-slimy-kind get a hint, (finally!) that they are not as smart as they think they are. (Surprise! Surprise!)

  2.       The unsuspecting audience is warned, unless they too are too stupid or in most cases, under some magical spell of the stupid-slimy-kind.

  3.       You make your point: “Don’t make me angry, you won’t like me when I’m angry.” The stupid-slimy-kind usually lack guts and back off, read as: they sulk, cry foul to everyone whose ears function and go around annoying other unsuspecting, idiotic souls.

  4.       Some more of the stupid-slimy-kind are warned against messing with you.

  5.       You feel slightly better off that you didn't just take crap quietly.

I have a very simple logic; I usually like people, till they give me a reason not to. Beyond that, they are just ignored, and their existence and the crap that comes with it make no difference to me. Maybe, it is a cynical way to react, but in the past few years I have learnt that this works just fine. Because unfortunately, I still am idiotic enough to expect that if I am nice to people, they’ll be nice to me.

Sshhh... Listen.

Silence, it could be the loud, inescapable, yet inaudible shriek of strain, of tension and of despair. Or it could be the calm, that you feel inside, that you feel when you are so inexplicably happy that, any noise, any sound seems inadequate to express your excitement. The first is a consequence of the shrieks, the screams, the pain , the stress that doesn't let anything else through. The second an instrument that makes every sound seem like music. Be it the happy chatter of people around you, the incessant traffic in a city bustling with life, or the giggle of a baby. 

Silence. The second kind, The happy kind. The kind that lets you think clearly. Think about all that happened, why it did, why it shouldn't have or why it was so right. Think about what you could have done differently and what you did right. Think about when and what you want to do next. Think about nothing at all. The kind that lets you feel clearly. Feel calm and excited. Feel satisfied and hungry. After a long, long time, such a silence has enveloped me. And finally, I feel so light.

There has been so much that has changed, I still haven’t gotten a grip on it. But, the biggest change of all is that I look forward to waking up, have tonnes of stories to tell at the end of the day and fall asleep as soon as I hit my bed. I’ve been so busy with all these changes that I haven’t gotten a chance to write about anything in a long, long time. I could probably write about every moment since this calm has settled in, yet right now, I really can’t. I am too busy taking it all in. Too busy making up for all that I missed when I couldn't hear or feel anything other than all the noise in my head.

Now, I feel happy. Finally. Right now, I just want to enjoy this. This being able to take in all the sounds and sights around me. The slate wiped clean, and free to be filled as and how I want to. In some time, when it all sinks in, maybe I would think about what next. Maybe then, I could write about all that is going on now. Maybe then. But now, I like this silence. I can read in peace, finally.

Later then!

No Less, No More

Just because they don’t approve, doesn’t mean I shouldn’t smile.

Just because it isn’t accepted, doesn’t mean it isn’t right.

Just because it isn’t final, doesn’t mean it can’t endure.

Just because it is hidden, doesn’t mean it isn’t pure.

It might not be the end, but what if it goes beyond?

It might not be all, but it still is much more.

More than we are taught, more than we expect

Yet, inevitably, impossible to accept

So be it, I don’t ask that either

Their approval they refuse

But, it’s happiness that I choose

For I know, however much be it

 It’s mine, all of it:

No less, No more.

On Your Mark, Get Set, Go

Imagine that you’re all set to run a 100m dash. The countdown has begun, and in your head you seem to be working out a plan to implement the best strategy for the race. The angle at which your feet should hit the ground, the length of each stride, how much energy you could conserve if your arms move in a controlled uniform fashion, the optimal speed guaranteeing consistency and stamina throughout the race and so on. Once you finish all the complex calculations and come up with a foolproof plan, you realize that most of your competitors have finished half the race or more, assuming you are pretty intelligent and came up with a plan before next year’s sports event.
 

Now, the scenario, seems pretty stupid, right? Why would anyone with some semblance of intelligence do that? But, I and, I assume, a lot of people like me have a tendency to do just that, in different scenarios, more frequent than the rare 100m dashes we run, if ever. If I have to do something, I will plan and plan and plan, till the deadline leaves me with no other option, but to just somehow get the task done with. Or, never do it in case of flexible deadlines or the lack of them. First, we just plain procrastinate for no reason whatsoever. Then one fine day we’re brimming with ideas and we start researching and planning, so far so good. Now, we plan some more, and waste the entire day. Next day, we could procrastinate or we could continue the research, come to some sort of a plan and procrastinate implementing it or just continue planning and kill the enthusiasm we had to begin with. After these tiring cycles of planning and procrastinating, someday we might finally get down to working or just forget about it and begin a new cycle, with new hopes and aspirations, and loads of new plans. This doesn’t happen always, we’re not that bad, especially if we have to meet deadlines, but it does happen, a lot. Especially when we aren’t following instructions or deadlines, when we have to do something on our own, times when it really, really matters.
 

So what are we actually supposed to do? We have to start! Start running as soon as the whistle blows, as we run, we could fall or realize that the current speed or intensity is not good enough or maybe will tire us out. We have to figure a way out while running, or probably even after the race, before the next one. The important thing is to begin.
 

During school, there were some teachers who encouraged us to prepare or read chapters before we attended the class, so that we could understand better. Whilst some asked us not to read beforehand, and come with an open mind, learn as we go through the lesson in class, as we try to solve problems before any specific method is taught to us. Each ideology has its share of advantages, the trick is to realize that we must adapt to both. To know that theoretical knowledge and planning will definitely lead us to make better, informed decisions, but there has to be a point when you just have to begin the race. If you plan to learn swimming, you could read about certain precautions, or tips, but you have to make the plunge. You have to learn how to swim by being in water, not by reading about it on Wikipedia and writing a thesis on it.
 

What good is training yourself for a race, planning and coming up with the perfect strategy if you never actually run it? We must start. It’s ok if we stop at 1%, we’ll figure out the 99% somehow, chances are it’s already been done. If not, we’ll do it first, but only if we try. The key lies in making that first move, taking that first plunge. The key lies in starting. Always.

 

"You don't have to be great to get started, but you have to get started to be great."

~ Les Brown

 

Hold On, Let Go

Claustrophobia must feel like this. So much has happened, so much has changed, yet the stillness is not letting me get even one word out. Wish I could write about it, but I probably don’t have the right, or the strength; about this: this which has engulfed me, a thick blanket as comforting as a warm hug, as suffocating as a clamped mouth. Not a word gets out, not a sigh stays in. Closed, hushed and repressed, like a secret must remain; yet, bursting with the life of a much dreamed joy. How do I get out of it? Or how do I let it out? Has it trapped me or have I buried it deep? This must be it, must be what they call claustrophobia. A thick mist enclosing me or an emptiness waiting to burst out, that my mind cannot seem to enclose much longer. If I break free, who will pick up the broken pieces? If I hold tight, what if I crush it? If I let go, what if it takes me with it? If I hold on, what if I am left with nothing? This must be it. Claustrophobia must feel like this.